Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
It seems so simple…speak with kindness to one another. Say “please”, “thank you” and “I’m sorry”. A few years ago, Pope Francis reminded families, of the importance of these words. He said:
The expressions: ‘may I’ (please)?, ‘thank you’, and ‘pardon me’ (I’m sorry). Indeed, these expressions open up the way to living well in your family, to living in peace. They are simple expressions, but not so simple to put into practice! They hold much power: the power to keep home life intact even when tested with a thousand problems. But if they are absent, little holes can start to crack open and the whole thing may even collapse.
Pope Francis, May 13, 2015 General Audience
When he spoke these simple yet profound words, he could not have foreseen the impact they could have in the year 2020. We are being tested with thousands of problems this year. How is your family doing? Is it time for a check-up? If those words are absent in your family, as Pope Francis said, “little holes can start to crack open….”
Being together with family is such a blessing. It gives us time to talk and teach our children to use their words. This is such an easy, but important life skill. We use words to form relationships; words teach us how to empathize; words help us discover similarities with each other and differences from each other. A conversation with someone can provide insight to another’s feelings and who they are as a person. Verbal communication with another person builds community and teaches proper behavior. It is improper behavior to have outbursts and fits when we want something, or we don’t like the way a situation is going. It is proper behavior to talk about what is or what is not working in a situation.
All too often, we can forget to have conversations to build and strengthen relationships with those we love the most, especially after spending so much time together in lockdown! We strengthen and build relationships by saying “please” when making a request. Part of this communication is receiving complements by responding “thank you”, and by saying “I’m sorry” to those we offend. Remember, we all make mistakes, even parents. In turn, we need to forgive someone who is sorry with the words “I forgive you”. Most important, we should listen and hear the words of others when they speak, then, we are modeling virtuous behavior. In fact, we are evangelizing to others our Catholic faith.
The next time you are tempted to lose it, try those three golden phrases from Pope Francis: “please”, “thank you”, “I’m sorry”.
Proverbs 15:4 A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.
Colossians 3: 12-14 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if one has a grievance against another; as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do.
2 Peter 1: 5-7 Make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, virtue with knowledge, knowledge with self-control, self-control with endurance, endurance with devotion, devotion with mutual affection, mutual affection with love.
