Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
“Freedom’s goal is to lead us to flourish not to fail. Freedom’s goal is Truth, Beauty and Goodness.” These words from the September Joy of the Family Blog, are still ringing the bells of conscience and still ringing the bells in the pursuit of excellence. God has given us the gift of Free Will! Essentially, God is Pro-Choice! That’s right God is Pro-Choice! The difference is that God desires us to choose what is good and true so we can truly flourish as human beings. God gives us the ability to choose, however, He also gives us the 10 Commandments and the Beatitudes for us to form and live in good conscience. It is the good choices we make that set us apart and give us strength to love one another and serve one another. When we make worldly choices, we are only thinking about ourselves and most often we fall into sinful choices. G. K. Chesterton said, “A dead thing can go with the stream, but only a living thing can go against it.” Dare to be different and make Good Choices! Dare to swim against the stream of our culture.
So how do we choose what is Good? How do we pursue excellence, that is, Truth, Beauty, and Goodness? In today’s world how do we make choices and act in ways that are faithful and honor God? Again, remembering the Beatitudes and the 10 Commandments, the Catechism gives us the wisdom we need for good choices. First, we must be sure that the action of our choice is Good. Even if the intention is for the best…the action itself must be Good. Second, our actions must be with good intention. We should always have in our thoughts helping and serving others, not our own selfish intentions, or the intention to hurt or wrong someone. An example would be to befriend someone only to get ahead or to benefit in some way. The third way to make sure our choice is good is to be sure that no matter what the circumstances of your action, if it is a sinful action, it is not good, period. Pope Benedict XVI said, “Truth is not determined by a majority vote.” How can you dare to be different? How can you show that Christian freedom is different than how our culture views “freedom” today?
Here’s what the Scriptures and our Catholic faith have to say…
Galatians 5: 1 – For Freedom Christ set us free; so, stand firm and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery.
1 John 3:19-20 – We will know by this that we are of the truth and will assure our heart before Him in whatever our heart condemns us; for God is greater than our heart and knows all things.
Galatians 5: 13– For you were called for freedom, brothers. But do not use this freedom as an opportunity for the flesh; rather, serve one another through love.
CCC 1742 – Freedom and Grace. The grace of Christ is not in the slightest way a rival of our freedom when this freedom accords with the sense of the true and the good that God has put in the human heart. On the contrary, as Christian experience attests especially in prayer, the more docile we are to the promptings of grace, the more we grow in inner freedom and confidence during trials, such as those we face in the pressures and constraints of the outer world. By the working of grace, the Holy Spirit educates us in spiritual freedom to make us free collaborators in his work in the Church and in the world.
Proverbs 16:9 – The mind of the man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.
Author: Most Reverend Gerald M. Barbarito, Bishop of Palm Beach
There are matters of faith in the beginning of Genesis which are essential to our faith and always important to reflect upon. As we face so many opportunities and challenges within our lives, it is always good to put them in perspective especially about to how God envisioned life and the world from the beginning. This may be especially important for us today as we recently commemorated the twentieth anniversary of the horrific event of 9/11 and as we face so many tragic situations in our world today.
In the beginning we see that God created the world. It did not come into existence by an accident but from the very being of God Himself. The account of creation in the book of Genesis makes very clear that God created the world out of nothing but with a purpose and order. We read of the creation of light, water and all those elements which give and sustain life from God. All of these follow a natural rhythm as we experience from the movement of the day into night and from one season into another. Genesis then tells us that God created both plant and animal life which are sustained by these elements and natural rhythm.
The Book of Genesis helps us to appreciate better that the world is indeed God’s. His purpose and laws are at the basis of all others. There is a natural law which comes from God Himself. All other laws must be in conformity to His. Genesis also helps us to appreciate better the beauty of creation which so many times we can take for granted. Each day, God reveals Himself to us in nature as the earth moves around the sun reflecting the very grandeur of God. Too many daily preoccupations and concerns can interfere with the joy that comes from appreciating this basic beauty.
When the creation of the world is complete, the Book of Genesis makes clear that God then created the pinnacle of His creation which is the human person. Everything else which God has created is given to and meant to sustain the human person. It is here that Genesis reveals to us one of the most basic truths, which is that the human person is created in the very image and likeness of God. Unlike the rest of creation, to be human means to share in the very depth of the life of God Himself and to reflect that life in the fullest way. This means that every person is given a dignity which comes from God and can never be taken away.
When God created the human person in His image and likeness, another basic truth of life is revealed to us. The Book of Genesis tells us that God created the person as male and female, “God created man in his image; in the divine image he created him; male and female he created them,” (Gen 1:27). It is here that the nature of marriage and family life is understood as a participation in the life of God Himself. For as Genesis also tells us, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two of them shall become one body,” (Gen 2:24). God lives for all eternity as a communion of love in the Persons of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Marriage is a reflection of that communion through which life comes into existence. Every single life, from the moment of conception, has an inherent dignity which comes from God. In the family, that dignity and purpose are brought to fruition as a participation in God’s life. Marriage and family life are not a creation of society but a reflection of God’s very life. How much this basic truth needs to be better understood and appreciated in our society today.
The beginning of the Book of Genesis also makes clear another basic truth. God created us to be happy. He placed the human person in the Garden of Eden in a natural state of happiness. God wants us to be happy and to know the joy that is His. It is only by living as He created us that we find this happiness. Living life in a manner that is forgetful of God and the natural order and beauty of His creation is what leads to unhappiness and frustration.
In this context the Book of Genesis places before us another fundamental truth. The first man and woman decided not to live in the manner for which God had created them but attempted to find happiness in another way and disobeyed God’s natural law. Once they did this, they put themselves in an unhappy state and caused a disruption in the order and plan of God’s creation. Original sin entered the world and with original sin came an accompanying disorder.
The Book of Genesis also makes clear another reality of our faith and that is the existence of the evil one – Satan. Man and woman were tempted to go against God’s plan by Satan who fooled them by making evil look good. They chose evil, and its accompanying unhappiness, because they thought it would make them happy. The devil works in subtle ways, and we must always be cautious in this regard. God has given us, as He gave the original man and woman, freedom. Freedom is not the ability to do whatever we want but the ability to choose the good. It is Satan who works against this and is most effective when his existence is denied. That is why the first baptismal promise, as well as the one made by a young person to be confirmed, is “Do you reject Satan, and all his works and all his empty promises?”
As we reflect upon these basic truths given to us in the very beginning in the Book of Genesis, it is also essential for us to reflect upon the basic truths given to us in the Person of Jesus Christ who took our human nature to Himself in order that He might free us from ourselves. The Gospel of St. John begins with the words reflecting the opening Book of Genesis, “in the beginning.” The Son of God became one of us to bring us back to the beginning which God had planned for us in creation. Not even sin can hinder God’s plan and prevent us from experiencing His love in the original way for which He had created us. God had a plan for us from the very beginning and it is Christ who restores us to that plan.
The Book of Genesis reminds us of fundamental truths. It is Christ who sheds light upon those truths and brings us back to them in order that we might have the joy for which God created us.
It is always good to go back to the beginning.
Here’s what Scripture and Tradition have to say…
Genesis 1:27 – God created man in his image; in the divine image he created him; male and female he created them.
Genesis 2:24 – That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two of them become one body.
Colossians 1:15-20 – He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn of all creation. For in him were created all things in heaven and on earth, the visible and the invisible, whether thrones or dominions or principalities or powers; all things were created through him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. He is the head of the body, the church. He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, that in all things he himself might be preeminent. For in him all the fullness was pleased to dwell, and through him to reconcile all things for him, making peace by the blood of his cross whether those on earth or those in heaven.
Catechism of the Catholic Church: 289 – Among all the Scriptural texts about creation, the first three chapters of Genesis occupy a unique place. From a literary standpoint these texts may have had diverse sources. The inspired authors have placed them at the beginning of Scripture to express in their solemn language the truths of creation – its origin and its end in God, its order and goodness, the vocation of man, and finally the drama of sin and the hope of salvation. Read in the light of Christ, within the unity of Sacred Scripture and in the living Tradition of the Church, these texts remain the principal source for catechesis on the mysteries of the “beginning”: creation, fall, and promise of salvation.
Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
In the Baltimore Catechism, we learn in the very first lesson that “God made us to know Him, to love Him, and to serve Him in this world, and to be happy with Him forever in Heaven”. Our Heavenly Father desires the very best for us, that is to be with Him forever. Ultimately, that is our hearts desire as well, we desire good, we desire God. We are meant to return to Him! Freedom is the catalyst that prepares us for heaven.
God is the giver of the gift of freedom. In the Catechism, it says, “Freedom is the power, rooted in reason and will, to act or not to act, to do this or that, and so to perform deliberate actions on one’s own responsibility. By free will one shapes one’s own life. Human freedom is a force for growth and maturity in truth and goodness; it attains it’s perfection when directed toward God, our beatitude.” (CCC 1731 emphasis added) But why does He give us this gift? What is it that God wants for us? Our Father in Heaven gives us this freedom to allow us to pursue or NOT pursue His will for our lives. He gives us the choice and responsibility to pursue excellence. He gives us the Freedom for Excellence.
In the Beatitudes, Jesus teaches, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven…and blessed are the clean of heart, for they will see God”. (Matthew 5: 3, 8). Jesus is giving us the keys to “happiness” in the Beatitudes. He is showing us how to achieve Freedom for Excellence. He is teaching us how to be saints. When we reflect on what is good and true, we change! We become something more. Freedom is the choices we make that lead us to what is good and true.
Freedom’s goal is to lead us to flourish not to fail. Freedom’s goal is Truth, Beauty, and Goodness. Freedom, like love is not a feeling, it is a choice or better, a decision. With freedom comes great responsibility. The choices we make should be virtuous to lead us to heaven, not sinful choices that lead us to anger and shame. The Catechism teaches, “A virtue is an habitual and firm disposition to do the good. It allows the person not only to perform good acts but to give the best of himself. The virtuous person tends toward the good with all his sensory and spiritual powers; he pursues the good and chooses it in concrete actions.” (CCC 1803 emphasis added)
We are blessed by the saints in heaven who show us freedom’s goal. The saints were able to overcome the evils of the world and choose excellence. They used God’s gift of freedom so they could “be happy with Him forever in heaven”. Take time to learn about saints who overcame the evils of the world and discerned God’s will for their lives. How can you use the freedom for excellence to pursue the good and choose it in your concrete actions?
Here’s what the Scriptures have to say…
Isaiah 61: 1-3 – The spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me; He has sent me to bring glad tidings to the lowly, to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and release to the prisoners, to announce a year of favor from the Lord and a day of vindication by our God, to comfort all who mourn; to place on those who mourn in Zion a diadem instead of ashes, to give them oil of gladness in place of mourning, a glorious mantle instead of a listless spirit. They will be called oaks of justice, planted by the Lord to show his glory.
John 8: 31-36 – Jesus then said to those Jews who believed in him, “If you remain in my word, you will truly be my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” They answered him, “We are descendants of Abraham and have never been enslaved to anyone. How can you say, ‘You will become free’?” Jesus answered them, “Amen, amen, I say to you, everyone who commits sin is a slave of sin. A slave does not remain in a household forever, but a son always remains. So, if a son frees you, then you will truly be free.
Galatians 5:13 – For you were called for freedom, brothers. But do not use this freedom as an opportunity for the flesh; rather, serve one another through love. For the whole law is fulfilled in one statement, namely “You shall love you neighbor as yourself.”
Author: Cathy Loh, Diocese of Palm Beach Director of Marriage, Family Life, Faith Formation and Youth Ministry
As the long, hot summer days speed by, we are once again quickly approaching the start of another school year. Ah, new beginnings, new hopes, new challenges, a time to start anew. Yes, God has provided us with many occasions for a fresh start…. a new calendar year, a new liturgical year, a new school year, indeed, each new day when God’s mercies are made new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23).
Our Christian faith encourages us to not let these opportunities go to waste. We must be intentional about making the most of them. Some of us may just overlook these opportunities for a fresh start, while others may set lofty goals. However, experts tell us that the greatest chance for success in starting over and creating lasting change is to focus and decide what is the one thing we can do to affect meaningful and positive change in our lives.
Where to start? Jesus teaches us that the greatest commandment is to love God with all your heart, soul, and mind, and the second greatest is to love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:37-39). What is the one thing that we can do today to better love God? We could spend some time with Him in prayer, even if just for a few minutes; it’s a place to start. Perhaps stop by Church for a daily Mass or just to sit with Him. Or we can stop in an Adoration Chapel. Jesus is truly present in the Eucharist, the consecrated bread, and He waits patiently for us to visit with Him, ready to bestow those mercies that are made new each morning. We could spend a few minutes reading His love letter to us, the Bible, where He tells us about His plans for us. We could seek Him in the Sacrament of Reconciliation where He forgives our sins and restores our relationship with Him. After all, Jesus tells us that the way to love God is to keep His commandments, and they are not burdensome (1 John 5:3). Well, that may require some divine assistance, so we can just ask for help and be assured that when we ask according to His will, He hears and answers us (1 John 5:14-15). So now we are back to prayer again. Have you ever tried to pray the Rosary? What about one decade? What’s the one thing you could do today to grow closer to Jesus, to love Him more?
What about loving our neighbor, who might just be a family member rather than the person next door? Or it could be someone we know or are related to who lives miles away. What’s the one thing we can do to love that person more? Maybe it’s as simple as a smile or forgiving the person who offended or annoyed us. Perhaps it’s offering up a prayer or making a phone call to say, “I’m thinking of you.” Maybe it’s something slightly more involved like making a meal or a visit or running an errand for them.
We all lead very busy lives, so we need to be intentional about making changes in those lives. How can we grow in love of God and neighbor? Take advantage of the opportunities to start fresh. Tomorrow is a new day, and God’s mercies will be there for you. Take some time, be intentional, and decide what is the one thing you can do, no matter how small, to better love God and neighbor.
Here’s what Scripture has to say…
Lamentations 3:22-23 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is thy faithfulness.
Matthew 22:36-39 “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?” And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it, you shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
1 John 5:2-3 By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome.
Here’s what the Saints have to say…
St. Teresa of Calcutta (Mother Teresa) Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.
St. Therese of Lisieux Miss no single opportunity of making some small sacrifice, here by a smiling look, there by a kindly word; always doing the smallest right and doing it all for love.
Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
There are countless scriptures telling us that our body is good, that God created us, male and female. God proclaims we are very good, and that we are a temple of the Holy Spirit. In 1 Corinthians, Paul teaches each of us to avoid sin against our body. In verses 19 – 20 he says, “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been purchased at a price. Therefore, glorify God in your body.” God tells us through His Word how much He loves us. He knew us before we were born. “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, before you were born, I dedicated you…” (Jeremiah 1:5). We are not a mistake and God created each of us out of love, for love! God does not make mistakes, and He certainly doesn’t make junk. When we alter, or harm our bodies, we reject the gift God has given us. Even when we reject the gift God has given us, He still loves us.
It is vital that we each reflect on God’s abundant love for us. Our body is to be respected in all ways. We should be cautious about what we put in our body, what we put on our body, and how we change our body. Anything we do to and with our body should honor God! In Romans 12:1, we learn in fact, our body is made to worship God.
When you are having a bad day, you may look in the mirror and see a distorted view of yourself, but in God’s eyes you are always beautiful, perfect, and good. Your view is distorted if you think that God somehow made a mistake. Always remember, “He formed you in your mother’s womb” (Psalm 139: 13). If you are seeking perpetual youth, has this become an idol in your life? If you are unhappy with certain parts of your body or unhappy you are made male or female, remember God created you perfect, without flaw. If you wake up in the morning and think God made a mistake…think again, He did not! He made you to reflect His glory in your own special way. Glorify God with your body because you are unique and beautiful! You are indispensable, irreplaceable, and unrepeatable! There is only one YOU.
Here is what the scriptures and our catholic faith have to say…
Psalm 139: 14-15 – I praise you, so wonderfully you made me; wonderful are your works! My very self you knew; my bones were not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret…
1 Corinthians 10:31 – So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for the glory of God.
Catechism of the Catholic Church (CCC 2288) Life and physical health are precious gifts entrusted to us by God. We must take reasonable care of them, taking into account the needs of others and the common good.
CCC 2293 – Basic scientific research, as well as applied research, is a significant expression of man’s dominion over creation. Science and technology are precious resources when placed at the service of man and promote his integral development for the benefit of all. By themselves however they cannot disclose the meaning of existence and of human progress. Science and technology are ordered to man, from whom they take their origin and development; hence they find in the person and in his moral values both evidence of their purpose and awareness of their limits.
Theology of the Body 19:4 – The central thesis of St. John Paul II’s Theology of the Body, is that “the body, and it alone, is capable of making visible what is invisible: the spiritual and the divine.
Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
Practice what you preach, or practice what you teach. In our world today, we are full of so much information. If we acted on it, some of that information could really make us different people, perhaps even better people. In Scripture, Jesus teaches us, actually, He commands us: “This I command you: love one another” John 15:17. This seems like a simple, practical, do-able command, and in our heads, we know it! We know it is what we must do! So how do we take it to our hearts and live this command? It is not an easy task to love one another, we really must set our own selfishness aside and appreciate each person for who God created them to be, without judgement, without trying to change them, without trying to control them. We are commanded to merely, “love one another”.
Taking knowledge to our hearts requires help! We really cannot do it alone; we need the Lord’s assistance. We need to ask Him in prayer! “Lord, please accompany us through our trials. We desire to love one another as you have commanded.” Our prayers can be simple, “Lord, help me to appreciate each person I meet today, help me to see them as You do.” “Help me to treat each person I meet with Christ-like love”.
“Love one another” sounds easy, and with God’s help, we might get a little closer to moving what we know is an important command, from our head to our heart and our actions. Pray today for the Lord to show you ways you can “love one another”, pray for the courage not to judge, change, or control. Pray to have more influence on people by showing them your love!
Here is what the scriptures have to say…
1 Peter 4:8-10 – Above all, let your love for one another be intense, because love covers a multitude of sins. Be hospitable to one another without complaining. As each one has received a gift, use it to serve one another as good stewards of God’s varied grace.
1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 – Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, love is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Philippians 2:3-4 – Do nothing out of selfishness or out of vainglory; rather, humbly regard others as more important than yourselves, each looking out not for his own interests, but also everyone for those of others.
John 13:34-35 – I give you a new commandment: love one another. As I have loved you, so you also should love one another. This is how all will know that you are my disciples if you have love for one another.
Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
Recently someone reminded me of the process that occurs when we use the internet. I am neither a tech savvy person nor a tech ignorant person, I am probably somewhere in between. In my words: Internet makes the Web possible; it is a huge network of computers which communicate together, many call it an “information superhighway”. So, when we want to watch a funny cat video, or answer important questions like “what sound does a cardinal make” or “who was the lead singer of the Foundations”, you type your question, and that question enters the information superhighway. This superhighway includes a trip to space where it bounces off a satellite comes all the way back to earth and communicates with a network of computers, probably bounces off another satellite in a different part of outer space and then the information finds its way back to your computer. It is quite amazing when you think about it. Yet, as I was reminded, how many times do you get upset that your internet is too slow? Have you ever sat back and thought about the amazing process that happens each time you hit enter? I was also reminded of a time when we had to research or ask other people about our questions. Sometimes when we ask someone a question, a conversation begins and if you are fortunate this conversation will lead to a lasting friendship or a great discovery. There was a time when we looked in books or went outside to observe and listen, we talked to other people and continued to ask the questions until we found an answer. Sometimes it took a long time, but it allowed us to wonder, what is the answer? We learned how to search for knowledge and information, and we discovered amazing things.
We are living in a fast-paced world. We expect things to happen immediately, and we get upset when they do not. Many of us cannot even wait in a line anymore. We have forgotten what Wonder is! Take a moment to look around you, pause from the information superhighway and physically survey all the amazing things you come across in a day. Use your senses! God created the world, and it is filled with so much more than we take the time to see, hear, taste, touch, and smell. Have you ever been driving, when the sun is rising, and it gets in your eyes? Do you take time to stop and see the beauty of the sunrise, or do you complain about its brightness? God created that amazing light and it gives us warmth, colors, and life. The person next to you could be making you happy, sad, angry, or just sitting there. God created that person to be unique, unrepeatable! God created each of us in His divine image, male and female He created us. Embrace the thought that God loves you so much that even before you were born, he was in love with you! Embrace the beauty in your masculinity or femininity and that God created you perfect! We have been inside too long; we have been fixated on our phones and computers too often. Praise God by going outside and looking at the beauty of all creation! Thank God for each day and for all the goodness that surrounds us!
Here is what the scriptures have to say…
Luke 5:26 Then astonishment seized them all and they glorified God, and struck with awe, they said, “We have seen incredible things today.”
Psalm 96:11-12 Let the heavens be glad and the earth rejoice; let the sea and what fills it resound; let the plains be joyful and all that is in them. Then let all the trees of the forest rejoice before the Lord who comes…!
Catechism of the Catholic Church 1299 At the Sacrament of Confirmation – In the Roman Rite the bishop extends his hands over the whole group of the confirmands. Since the time of the apostles this gesture has signified the gift of the Spirit. The bishop invokes the outpouring of the Spirit in these words: All powerful God, Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, by water and the Holy Spirit you freed your sons and daughters from sin and gave them new life. Send your Holy Spirit upon them to be their help and guide. Give them the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of right judgment and courage, the spirit of knowledge and reverence. Fill them with the spirit of wonder and awe in your presence. We ask this through Christ our Lord.
Matthew 6:25-29 Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they? Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your lifespan? Why are you anxious about clothes? Learn from the way the wildflowers grow. They do not work or spin. But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was clothed like one of them. If God so clothes the grass of the field, which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow, will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith? So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’ or ‘What are we to drink?’ Or ‘What are we to wear?’ All these things the pagans seek. Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides. Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself.
Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
In Matthew 11:28-30 Jesus says, “Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” The word “yoke”, used many times in scripture, is a wooden beam that is fitted around oxen necks to equip and empower them to carry loads and do the work they need to do on their farm. There are two holes or spaces for each ox to put its neck and somewhere in the middle is a bar or rope for the farmer who oversees directing them to accomplish their task. Keep this image in mind as you read on…
We are not called to be perfect; we are called to be holy. How do we pass this message to our families? What does holiness look like?
The first thing to reflect on when asking these questions is how do you as husband and wife, live your faith together? The Gospel of Matthew is telling us that we are to be “yoked” with the Father. In marriage, we have the image of the husband and wife being yoked together with God as the couple’s guide. That is, the couple helps each other, and works together with the guidance of the Father. A spouse is never to manipulate or control, rather, a spouse is to be as a gift to the other. With the yoke, God gives them the graces to persevere. Together they are to be a gift to the Lord asking, how can I be loved by you, Lord? God is loving us by directing us away from harm and giving us order and especially, letting us rest. Like the relationship of the oxen and the farmer, when a man and a woman are married, they invite God into their relationship to guide them. If God is not in their relationship it can unravel into conflict and defiance. On the contrary, with Him, it can be beautiful, calm, loving, peaceful, and accepting. This is an image of marriage we need to pass on to our children, to model this love just as God has modeled for us. In our Catholic faith, marriage is a Sacramental union of a man, a woman, and God. Marriage is the foundation of the family, the domestic church.
God uses His Word like a yoke to guide us. In Ephesians 6:4, God provides us with parenting instructions: “Fathers (parents), do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up with the training and instruction of the Lord.” It is our job as parents to present knowledge, opportunities, and encounters so that our children can see the beauty that comes from life with Christ. Your children are not yoked in your marriage with you, but they are watching to see how you follow Him. Finally, but perhaps the most important advice comes from Ephesians 6:18 – “With all prayer and supplication, pray at every opportunity in the Spirit.” Take time to pray with your spouse and especially with your family, in the morning offer your day to God, at meals pray a blessing over your food and your family, when you drop them off at school (virtual or in person) pray for a good day, at bedtime a prayer of thanksgiving for the trials and blessings of the day. Consider praying a rosary, once a week as a family. Look to God with awe and wonder; you may be burdened today, but taking God’s yoke, He will give you rest.
What does the Church and Scripture have to say?
Matthew 11:28-30 – Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for yourselves. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Ephesians 6:4 – Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up with the training and instruction of the Lord.
Ephesians 6:18 – With all prayer and supplication, pray at every opportunity in the Spirit.
Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
It seems so simple…speak with kindness to one another. Say “please”, “thank you” and “I’m sorry”. A few years ago, Pope Francis reminded families, of the importance of these words. He said:
The expressions: ‘may I’ (please)?, ‘thank you’, and ‘pardon me’ (I’m sorry). Indeed, these expressions open up the way to living well in your family, to living in peace. They are simple expressions, but not so simple to put into practice! They hold much power: the power to keep home life intact even when tested with a thousand problems. But if they are absent, little holes can start to crack open and the whole thing may even collapse.
When he spoke these simple yet profound words, he could not have foreseen the impact they could have in the year 2020. We are being tested with thousands of problems this year. How is your family doing? Is it time for a check-up? If those words are absent in your family, as Pope Francis said, “little holes can start to crack open….”
Being together with family is such a blessing. It gives us time to talk and teach our children to use their words. This is such an easy, but important life skill. We use words to form relationships; words teach us how to empathize; words help us discover similarities with each other and differences from each other. A conversation with someone can provide insight to another’s feelings and who they are as a person. Verbal communication with another person builds community and teaches proper behavior. It is improper behavior to have outbursts and fits when we want something, or we don’t like the way a situation is going. It is proper behavior to talk about what is or what is not working in a situation.
All too often, we can forget to have conversations to build and strengthen relationships with those we love the most, especially after spending so much time together in lockdown! We strengthen and build relationships by saying “please” when making a request. Part of this communication is receiving complements by responding “thank you”, and by saying “I’m sorry” to those we offend. Remember, we all make mistakes, even parents. In turn, we need to forgive someone who is sorry with the words “I forgive you”. Most important, we should listen and hear the words of others when they speak, then, we are modeling virtuous behavior. In fact, we are evangelizing to others our Catholic faith.
The next time you are tempted to lose it, try those three golden phrases from Pope Francis: “please”, “thank you”, “I’m sorry”.
Proverbs 15:4 A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.
Colossians 3: 12-14 Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another, if one has a grievance against another; as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do.
2 Peter 1: 5-7Make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, virtue with knowledge, knowledge with self-control, self-control with endurance, endurance with devotion, devotion with mutual affection, mutual affection with love.
Author: Beth Zanotelli, Diocese of Palm Beach Coordinator of Family Life
Life is a crazy, wonderful journey and so often we wish we would have known then, what we know now. On your journey do you ever take time to reflect on what your parents taught you? Right from the start, it is so important for everyone and especially for our children to know how special we all are in God’s eyes. I can remember my father telling me that God made me so special. AS IS! I didn’t have to do anything extra to gain His love, I already had it. God loves me just the way I am! As I grew older, my father also taught me to reach for the stars in everything I wanted to accomplish. (He added if you fall a little short, it’s ok because you were aiming really high) Give your kids this opportunity. Do you tell them how special they are? Not because they are doing the things you want them to do and achieving the things the world wants them to achieve, rather because God made them in His image and likeness…and He made them out of love, for love!!
As we begin this Joy of the Family blog, take a moment to look in the mirror. Look at yourself the same way God sees you and smile because He is smiling. He made you just the way you are, and He loves you just the way you are. Take time and reflect. Do you know how much God loves you? You are His beloved!You are His beloved Son or beloved Daughter! Go and tell your family, especially your children, how special they are. They don’t have to do a thing for Jesus to love them, He loves them just the way they are. We are called to share this Good News with everyone we meet, so we can be faithful disciples of Christ.
How special we are to be in this life, knowing God and knowing His infinite love. Doesn’t it make you want to know Him better? Spend time this week with God…sit in silence and just reflect on God’s creation. Open up His Word to read His messages to You. If you still can’t hear Him…try inserting your name in each of the scriptures. “See what love the Father has bestowed on _____ that he/she may be called a child of God. Yet, so You are….”
1 John 3:1 See what love the Father has bestowed on us that we may be called the children of God. Yet, so we are. The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare, not for woe!
Romans 5:8 But God proves his love for us in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.
