Author: Beth Zanotelli

A wise priest recently spoke about parenting in his homily.  He said, “When your kids do something wrong rather than asking them, ‘What were you thinking?’…ask them, ‘What did you expect would happen?’”.  It is a great question that can help all of us learn from our mistakes.  This question causes us to intentionally think about our actions, something we could all benefit from!  This question makes a case for being intentional and thinking before we act. Perhaps we would make fewer poor choices if we paused to think about the outcome of our actions more often and before we acted. It is important to consider that the outcome of our actions most often affects someone else’s life.  Think about selfish actions like gossip, being judgmental, even speeding; on the positive side, think about giving a gift, saying something kind, offering help, or stopping when the light turns yellow.  Each of these actions affects another person. Perhaps we should think of others more than we think of ourselves!  Being more intentional in our actions, making ourselves a gift to others, thinking before we act and speak.  All these things seem simple enough!

How can we be more intentional?  At the beginning of the day, wake up thinking of the actions that will glorify God.  We can offer our day to the Lord by saying, “This day is Yours, God – I give it to you!” We can think of ways to sacrifice for others, instead of ways to personally gain. We can ask ourselves, “What do I expect will happen?”

At the end of the day, we can do an examination of conscience.  We can take time to think about the things that happened during the day; Ask ourselves if we thought before we acted; Ask ourselves how we impacted the life of another; ask ourselves if things turned out the way we expected…would God be glorified by our actions? 

“What did we expect would happen?”, makes a great question for an examination of conscience before the Sacrament of Reconciliation.  What did we think would happen if we were lazy and didn’t go to mass?  What did we expect to happen when we judged someone by how they looked, or what they did?  What did we expect to happen when we gossiped?  What did we expect would happen when we ignored someone or cast them aside because we were too busy? What did we expect to happen when _______? Fill in the blanks.

Here’s what the scriptures have to say:

Ephesians 5:15-17 – Watch carefully then how you live, not as foolish persons but as wise, making the most of the opportunity, because the days are evil.  Therefore, do not continue in ignorance, but try to understand what is the will of the Lord.

1 Corinthians 10:31 – So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for the glory of God.

John 15:13 – No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

Hebrews 10:24-25 – We must consider how to rouse one another to love and good works.  We should not stay away from our assembly, as is the custom of some, but encourage one another, and this all the more as you see the day drawing near.

Philippians 3:13-14 – Brothers, I for my part do not consider myself to have taken possession.  Just one thing:  forgetting what lies behind but straining forward to what lies ahead, I continue my pursuit toward the goal, the prize of God’s upward calling, in Christ Jesus.

Ephesians 4:32 – And be kind to one another, compassionate, forgiving one another as God has forgiven you in Christ.

The Collect for mass a few days ago said, “Show gracious favor, O Lord, we pray, to the works of penance we have begun, that we may have the strength to accomplish with sincerity the bodily observances we undertake.” We are in the first week of Lent and many, if not most of us have made some kind of commitment to fast, pray and give alms. Each of us has the best of intentions, however, we easily get distracted, especially from new undertakings.  Some might call this the “squirrel effect”.  We can be focused on one thing and then something else catches our attention, and “squirrel” we are off doing something completely different.  How many times have we gone to do something, and then accomplished five other things but not the thing we originally set out to do?  Probably several times each day!

Whether it is the season of Lent or any other time, it is important to try to rid ourselves of the vices in our lives and to build virtuous habits.  Along the way, there are distractions that keep us from fully reaching our goal.  Each day we need to wake up and be reminded of what our good intentions are for the day and pray “for the strength to accomplish with sincerity the bodily observances we undertake.”  When we attempt to avoid distractions, we need to have a plan, we need strength for the journey!  First, we must remember each day what we want to accomplish or avoid, and second, we need to keep the manner, or sincerity of the fast that God desires us to have.  The first thoughts or words we have in the morning could be, “Good Morning, Lord, please help me keep my promises today!” or “Today, help me be faithful”.  Beyond remembering our acts of penance for Lent, what is the manner we are making them happen?  The prophet Isaiah asks “Is this the manner of fasting I wish, of keeping a day of penance?” (Isaiah 58:5) For many of us, this is quite a huge undertaking…remember the task and do it in a manner worthy of God.  The truth of the Word of God exists to help us. Take time to pray with His Word. Avoid the Squirrels and focus on what matters!  Here’s some strength for the journey:

• Pray for the ability to focus, not on ourselves, but rather to make a gift of our lives. (1Peter4:10)
• Help us to learn to always seek to do His will, not our own. (Matthew 6:33)
• Make love the rule, in all relationships (even our relationship with ourselves) disregard self-interest and always think of others. (Philippians 2:4)
• Prefer the good of others to our own. (Colossians 1: 9-12)

Here’s what the Scriptures have to say:

1 Peter 4:10 – As each one has received a gift, use it to serve one another as good stewards of God’s varied grace.

Matthew 6:33 – But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given you besides.

Philippians 2:3-4  – Do nothing out of selfishness or out of vainglory; rather, humbly regard others as more important than yourselves, each looking out not for his own interests, but also everyone for those of others.

Colossians 1:9-12 – Therefore, from the day we heard this, we do not cease praying for you and asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding to live in a manner worthy of the Lord, so as to be fully pleasing, in every good work bearing fruit and growing in the knowledge of God, strengthened with every power, in accord with his glorious might, for all endurance and patience, with joy giving thanks to the Father, who has made you fit to share in the inheritance of the holy ones in light.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 begins with a list of characteristics describing love.  Love is patient, kind, not jealous, not pompous, not inflated, not rude.  The passage goes on to include that love does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, and doesn’t brood over injury. There is so much here, but to be clear, the opposite of brooding over injuries is forgiving those who offend us right away and from the heart. The list is not finished because 1 Corinthians continues by telling us that Love does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, which means it is willing to carry our load and sacrifice for each of us. To Love is to will the good of others.  Love believes, hopes, and endures.  Finally, Love never fails.  What a beautiful description of God’s authentic love for His children.

God’s authentic love is far beyond what most of us are used to giving and receiving from one another. God loves us so much that he calls us to something greater.  He welcomes us with open arms when we mess up and His love includes mercy and compassion. Even though we often fall short, we should not hesitate to ask Him for more than we feel worthy of receiving.  In Matthew 8:8 the Centurion says, “Lord, I am not worthy to have you enter under my roof; only say the word and my servant will be healed.”  These are the same words we recite before receiving Him in the Eucharist.  All He has to do is say a word and we are healed, forgiven, and made whole. We receive His grace as we receive Him;   With His grace we can authentically love one another. 

Keep God as the focus of everything in your life, receive Him in the Eucharist and you will receive His grace, be healed, forgiven, and made whole because – God is Love!

Here’s what the Scriptures have to say:

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 – Love is patient, love is kind.  It is not jealous, is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth.  It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things endures all things.  Love never fails…

1 John 4:7-8 – Beloved, let us love one another, because love is of God; everyone who loves is begotten by God and knows God.  Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love.

John 13:34-35 – I give you a new commandment:  love one another.  As I have loved you, so you also should love one another.  This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

St. Teresa of Calcutta also known as Mother Teresa said, “Prayer is not asking. Prayer is putting oneself in the hands of God, at His disposition, and listening to His voice in the depth of our hearts.”  These words are a great way to understand and realize the importance of having a spiritual life.  To put yourself in the hands of God…is to surrender your will to His. We need to say, “not my will, Lord, but yours be done.” Often our prayer life is full of whining and complaining, and of a laundry list of needs. Instead of asking, which we need to do, Mother Teresa invites us to listen to His voice in the depth of our hearts.

This seems like an easy task when Mother Teresa says it…she is a consecrated woman, who spent her life in prayer and service to others.  What about the person who has fallen away from the Lord, or struggles to know God?  How do we connect with God amid all the chaos and confusion of the world?  How do we listen to the Truth in our hearts and renounce the lies the world tells us?

Mother Teresa gives us more wisdom when she says, “We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature—trees, flowers, grass—grows in silence; see the stars, the moon, and the sun, how they move in silence. We need silence to be able to touch souls.”  If God is a friend of silence, imagine his reaction to today’s noisy world.  It is difficult to find a moment without technology buzzing, blinking, or pinging.  How many conversations do we have each day that are interrupted by technology?  God wants us to “grow in silence” or perhaps to be silent so we can grow! 

It has been written about Mother Teresa that the first thing she did everyday was to say, “Good Morning, Jesus”.    She would say this before she got out of bed, maybe even before she opened her eyes. It seems like a simple beginning to a new day and a simple beginning to a spiritual life.  By saying “Good morning, Jesus”, you acknowledge the relationship that matters the most! Try saying, “Good morning, Jesus” out loud before you get out of bed.  Try it for 10 days, after 10 days check and see if your prayer life has increased.  Check and see if you have a closer relationship with God, and then keep saying it for another 10 days.  Build new habits and good habits for the rest of your life by starting simple and doing things that are natural.

Here’s what Scripture has to say:

Matthew 6:6-8 – …when you pray, go to your inner room, close the door, and pray to your Father in secret.  And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.  In praying, do not babble like the pagans, who think that they will be heard because of their many words.  Do not be like them.  Your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 – Rejoice always.  Pray without ceasing.  In all circumstances give thanks, for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.

Romans 8: 26-28 – In the same way, the Spirit too comes to the aid of our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but the Spirit itself intercedes with inexpressible groanings.  And the one who searches hearts knows what is the intention of the Spirit, because it intercedes for the holy ones according to God’s will.

1 Kings 19:11-12 – Then the Lord said, “Go outside and stand on the mountain before the Lord; the Lord will be passing by.”  A strong and heavy wind was rending the mountains and crushing rocks before the Lord – but the Lord was not in the wind.  After the wind there was an earthquake – but the Lord was not in the earthquake.  After the earthquake there was fire – but the Lord was not in the fire.  After the fire there was a tiny whispering sound.

Author: Beth Zanotelli, Family Life Coordinator for the Diocese of Palm Beach

Have you ever heard of Milk Weed?  It’s the plant that monarch butterflies eat.  You can buy it at almost any plant store. You place it in the ground and miraculously within a few weeks you can witness an amazing transformation of caterpillar to chrysalis to butterfly.  The life cycle of a butterfly is one of the many beautiful things God created.  The butterfly lifecycle has lessons and symbolism that each of us can draw from.  Silly though it may seem, this transformation is like the work of Jesus. The most obvious similarity is Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection.  On Easter Sunday, the glory and beauty of the Resurrected Christ emerges from the tomb. There are no direct references to butterflies in the Bible, but did you ever ponder the new creation God desires from you each day? What if you allow Him to transform your life?

An early stage of the butterfly life cycle is the caterpillar, creeping, and eating.  This creature transforms completely into a beautiful flying insect.  It is completely changed in appearance and in the way it gets from one place to another.  The caterpillar goes from crawling and transforms into a butterfly that flies!  In Romans 12:1-2, St. Paul urges “by the mercies of God, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God, your spiritual worship.  Do not conform yourselves to this age but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and pleasing and perfect.”  When you seek to do God’s will, letting go of earthly pleasures and allowing your life to be a sacrifice for others, God transforms you.  If you allow this transformation, you will put on the newness of life.  You will see the life that God desires for you. 

Another similarity to the life cycle of a butterfly is its nourishment.  The caterpillar feeds on a weed.  In the end, it has eaten the entire plant, growing huge by feasting, but it still longs for more.  After the caterpillar transforms into a butterfly, there is a new feast.  Now the butterfly feasts on the sweet nectar of flowers.  When the Lord is allowed to enter and transform your heart, to create anew, you will long for the sweetness of eternal life with Him, the salvation of heaven!  “So, whoever is in Christ is a new creation:  the old things have passed away:  behold, new things have come!”  Corinthians 5:17.

Come to the banquet God has prepared for you!  Feast on the Eucharist, the Living Bread of Life!   Allow the Body of Christ to transform you from within.  Seek forgiveness and healing.  When you reconcile with others you reconcile with the Lord.  As you continually die to sin you will be united with Christ in His life, death, and resurrection so you can join Him in Eternal Glory. 

Here’s what Scripture has to say:

2 Corinthians 3:18 – All of us, gazing with unveiled face on the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, as from the Lord who is the Spirit.

Romans 6:4 – We were indeed buried with him through baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might live in newness of life.

Acts 2:38 – Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins; and you will receive the gift of the holy Spirit.”