Let’s not give up on each other…

By Cathy Loh
Diocese of Palm Beach Director of Marriage, Family Life, Faith Formation and Youth Ministry

“It is not good for the man to be alone…” declared God in the Garden of Eden after he created Adam, the first man (Genesis 2:18).  Why is this important?  Because we are made for relationship, for friendship.  We are made in the image and likeness of God who is a community, a trinity, three persons in one God.  So, being made in God’s image means that we are made for relationship, with God and with each other.

Our innate need for relationship is why the isolation experienced during this past year of COVID-19 lockdowns, social distancing and masks has been harmful to so many.  It is well documented that babies need regular physical touch for normal cognitive development and to learn to relate socially.  It is not only newborns who need touch to thrive, adults also need contact for their physical and emotional wellbeing.  Imagine the toll on the elderly and the sick, who have had to face so many days separated from loved ones, deprived of a hug or kiss or reassuring pat on the arm.  Not to mention the impact on the spouses, children, or other relatives of those isolated from them. While technology can be a blessing and enable us to “see” our loved ones, it is a poor substitute for physical presence. Sometimes this virtual connection is not even possible.

Another experience of isolation or deprivation comes in the form of faces hidden behind masks.  My heart aches for the little ones, toddlers, children who may not be deprived of physical touch, but are deprived of a smile or other facial expressions blocked by masks.  What impact will these masks have on children’s social interactions and their ability to interpret facial expressions in the future?  Time will tell.

While we navigate this uncharted territory of a worldwide pandemic, we need to consider the unintended but natural and not surprising consequences of our actions.  We must prudently balance protection in the present with protection for a future.  We must remember that God created us for relationship, for community.  To deprive the healthy, let alone the young, frail, sick or elderly, of contact with their loved ones, is to deny our innate need for community and risk our spiritual and emotional wellbeing.

As we enter into this penitential season of Lent, let us remember how much we have already given up this past year.  Let us consider our loved ones and how we might reach out to offer them consolation and fellowship.  Let us consider how to prudently balance the spiritual and emotional needs of those we love with their physical safety needs.  Let us not overlook our own need for connection and community.  To continue to emphasize one need at the expense of the other may mean we are resting in a false sense of security rather than prayerfully trusting in the God who made us in His image for community.

Here is what the scriptures have to say…

Genesis 2:24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 Where a lone man can be overcome, two together can resist. A three-ply cord is not easily broken.

 Matthew 18:20 For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.